Bringing Julian up to speed

Gordon Robinson, Contributor

An open letter to my member of parliament, Julian Robinson (no relation):

Dear Julian,

Although I didn't vote for you (or for anyone else) in the recent general election, the bad news for you is enough voters did that you're now my MP. Accordingly, I intend to harass you regularly with my local concerns.

If it's any consolation, had I been enumerated and inclined to vote, it would've been for you. One day, if I'm permitted to vote for an MP only, I'll gladly vote for you.

In the meantime, please remember nobody voted for you to be minister of anything, so, first and foremost, I'm bringing some constituency concerns to your attention. You see, Julian, I live in one of a collection of matchboxes in a middle-income, gated community in your constituency.

"Little boxes on the hillside.

Little boxes made of ticky tacky.

Little boxes on the hillside,

Little boxes all the same.

There's a green one and a pink one

and a blue one and a yellow one

and they're all made out of ticky tacky

and they all look just the same."

Our main problem, Julian (I write on behalf of my fellow matchbox inmates), is an inconsistent water supply. We experienced a dreadful drought in 2009-10 which we suffered in silence because, although we knew it was flooding on the north coast every day where millions of gallons of water were going to waste while we went weeks at a time without water, we recognised the immediate problem. We gritted our teeth; ignored decades of absent planning that diverted rainfall available for capture and storage on to Ocho Rios, St Ann's Bay and Runaway Bay streets which became rivers; grinned; and bore it.

Eventually, the drought broke. Yet we still suffer frequent water lock-offs, especially at night. But the most disgusting situation is that, whenever it rains heavily, that's when we have the longest water lock-offs.

Water, water everywhere ... .

The National Water Commission (NWC) says the problem is at the Hope Treatment Plant. Apparently, environmental degradation of the watershed over decades resulted in severely reduced flows in Hope River. A worse result is that, in rainy seasons, more mud than water flows into the treatment plant, so it's often closed after heavy rainfall.

Urgent necessity

Julian, the upgrade of the Hope Treatment Plant to include environmental reclamation is an urgent necessity. The residents of my matchbox community are fortunate. Most of us have jobs. However, we'd like to show up to work smelling like people who bathe.

"And the people, in the houses,

all went to the university,

where they all were put in boxes

and they came out all the same.

And there's doctors, and lawyers,

and business executives,

and they're all made out of ticky tacky

and they all look just the same."

The contractor general's website discloses that, in July 2011, the former government entered into a National Contracts Commission-approved US$17-million contract for the rehabilitation of the Mona and Hope water-treatment plants. It appears the project is funded by an IDB loan, and the contractor, Vinci Construction Grands Projets, is a world-renowned designer and builder of major civil engineering structures who has won safety and other awards worldwide.

Additionally, my usually reliable sources tell me that the planned work, scheduled to take 18 months, will ensure the Hope plant can treat heavily silted water and with improved energy efficiency. For the long term, a further US$10-million loan has been obtained for rehabilitation and mitigation environmental work, under the NRCA's direction, in the Hope and Yallahs River watersheds in order to reverse some of the unfortunate and costly environmental degradation.

Why am I bothering you with all this detail, Julian? Two reasons. First, because it's your job to ensure that the new executive plays no old-style politics with these programmes. As my MP, I expect you to watch and beset new minister of water, Robert 'Chicken Feed' Pickersgill, without mercy to guarantee there's none of the usual change for change's sake; that the work is carried out according to plan; and that I can have a regular water supply by mid-2013. For my part, I'll be watching you.

I'm also bothering you because The Old Ball and Chain assures me you're worth it. About 10 years ago, Old BC was in a line at Tastee Patties when a gentleman (well, a man) pushed past all in the line and bored to the front. When challenged by Old BC (no shrinking violet, that one) regarding his bad manners, he shouted in reply, "P.J. Patterson don't have to join no line, so me nah join none!"

Poor P.J., who never behaved as if he thought he was something special, must be distressed to learn his name was used to justify an exhibition of such appalling values and attitudes. But so it was that our lack of education as a society was cruelly exposed and the need for political leaders to take extra care regarding their public postures underscored.

On January 19, 2012, Old BC had just completed a mission at the post office, having stood in a line to do so when you walked in and joined the line to pay your bills. She was so pleasantly surprised at your obvious disinterest in special treatment that, on her way out, she spoke to you about it. You expressed surprise that you'd be expected to do anything else. I've heard nothing from her since but repeated comparisons of the two incidents. Frankly, Julian, I think she's in love.

So, Julian, I'm watching you but with high expectations. Worse, Old BC now expects much from you. She says to tell you, regarding the above water plan, that the most important part of "rehabilitation and mitigation environmental work" is the replanting of trees. Don't let her down. Me, you needn't worry about. If you get on her bad side, dog nyam yu suppa! If you don't believe me, ask your friend Jiggs.

Your Constituent,

Gordon Robinson

P.S. Julian, one last thing, said Lieutenant Colombo. This time in your appointed capacity as state minister for mining, energy and ICT. Please be different. Don't play political football with ICT. Please clear the air as a matter of urgency on the Government's position regarding Young Andrew's removal of the condition placed upon the Digicel-Claro merger that the two be kept separate. I tried to do just that in a column last Sunday ('Political cell-out'), but, apparently, it contained too many facts and specific references for the politically brainwashed.

Comments like "But a question no one seems to be asking is why did Digicel seemingly agree to them?" and "I think the initial publicly known agreement was done to trick the people and that's why the change was done secretly" came thick and fast. Had anyone bothered to read the column carefully, it would have been obvious that DIGICEL DID NOT AGREE to the condition.

arbitrarily imposed

It was unilaterally imposed by the minister as a vital part of his conditional approval of the merger. This arbitrarily imposed condition was never 'agreed' to by either Digicel or Claro, which is why Digicel appealed to the minister for reconsideration, as it's entitled to do under Section 60 of The Telecommunications Act which provides:

"60(1) A person who is aggrieved by a decision of the minister may ... apply to the minister in the prescribed manner for a reconsideration of the matter.

(2) ... The minister may (b) confirm, modify or reverse that decision or any part thereof."

Interestingly, no fetter is placed on the minister's discretion to reconsider but, where the decision being reconsidered is the OUR's and an application to reconsider is made to the OUR, that body can only hear the application if "new facts or changed circumstances [unavailable to the applicant at the time the matter was first considered]" are proved or if the applicant alleges "that the decision was based upon material errors of fact and law".

In this case, I have no idea what Digicel put before Young Andrew but, despite it not being a statutory requirement to trigger the minister's reconsideration, it's clear that the condition was imposed based upon a material error of law, namely that the minister had any authority in the first place to impose such a condition. Its removal was legally unavoidable, commercially necessary and conducive to Government's duty to attract local and foreign investment.

Julian, please take steps to remove this matter from the realm of politics once and for all. Both Young Andrew and your own Phillip Paulwell acted responsibly and correctly. The previous

Government can't be accused of "secrecy" if the Opposition was fully consulted and the issue a straightforward one. The problem is that, once the indoctrinated are allowed to bandy the words "secret deal" around, it makes the entire episode seem so much more exciting than it really is. Come on, Julian, please prove Old BC's assessment of you to be correct.

P.P.S. Until recently, I thought the lyrics for seminal folk song Little Boxes were written by Pete Seeger, the man most associated with the song. Proving that one can learn from anybody, it was my first-born son, DJ Rob, 'The Computer Geek', who informed me that the author was Malvina Reynolds. Malvina and her husband were driving along the California coast from their home in Berkeley, through San Francisco and down the peninsula to La Honda where she had a singing engagement. As she drove through Daly City, she said, "Bud, take the wheel. I feel a song coming on."

Peace and love.

Gordon Robinson is an attorney-at-law. Email feedback to columns@gleanerjm.com.