Doctor's advice: Safe sex?

Q I am 26 years old, and my girlfriend and I have sex about five or six times for the week.

I always pull out just before the end. And then she immediately gets up and passes urine.

Are these methods OK as a way of preventing pregnancy? And are they safe for our health?

A What you are doing will have no effect at all on anybody's health. But as a method of contraception, it is not too useful.

You see, a lot of young people are into the pulling-out method in an effort to avoid pregnancy. This technique is centuries old, and it is known medically as coitus interruptus, which is Latin for 'interrupted intercourse'.

Experts say that it is very liable to go wrong, mainly because there is often leakage of sperm inside the vagina before the guy's climax occurs. Also, young men are very likely to leave the penis inside for just a moment too long, so that the first jet of seminal fluid goes into the vagina rather than landing somewhere outside.

I must admit that there are couples who successfully use this withdrawal method over several years, and manage to avoid pregnancy. But it is risky business. Frankly, you have been lucky to get away with it so far.

Your backup method of contraception involves your girlfriend getting up immediately after sex and passing urine. Again, this is a very old technique, which ancient Roman women used to try. But it is completely useless.

Why is it useless? Because the female's urinary opening is several inches away from where the sperm fall. So passing urine cannot have the slightest effect on the number of sperm in the vagina.

I urge you and your girlfriend to get yourselves some regular method of contraception. For instance, she could go on the Pill or use a coil, or you could use a condom.

Please obtain some advice about contraception from a doc or nurse as soon as possible.

QA friend once told me that guys who masturbate will take a longer time to ejaculate when they have sex.

Is that true?

A No. There is absolutely no scientific evidence for this theory.

QI'm eight weeks pregnant. At times, my belly really hurts me. What I notice is that it pains me when my period should have started.

Is it normal to have belly pain during the first couple of months of pregnancy?

A No, it isn't. I do not know why you are getting this pain because there are literally dozens of possibilities.

For instance, you could have a urinary infection. That is quite common in early pregnancy.

But what is certain is this. You must see a doc right away. Take a specimen of urine with you. Good luck.

Q I am a guy of 20. I have been masturbating for around five years. Now I notice two things.

First, I am getting pain after masturbation. Why?

Second, there are times when I pass a few drops of semen while I am asleep at night.

What is going on?

A I am frankly puzzled by the fact that you are getting pain after masturbation. You do not say where the pain is concentrated but, presumably, you mean in the testicles or in the penis.

I don't think it is likely that you have any kind of infection, especially as I get the impression that you are still a virgin. Nevertheless, I am sure that you should let a doc examine your genitals. The odds are that he will be able to tell you that this is just something trivial.

Your second question concerns producing seminal fluid while you are asleep. I don't think you have realised that this is normal for young men of your age. Pay it no mind.

QI am a 16-year-old. When the menses first started, I did not have period pain. But now I do.

Why?

A Your story is typical of many teenage girls. When a young woman first starts having periods, it is often the case that she has not yet started ovulating. Ovulating means producing an ovum (egg) each month.

And, in general, if you don't ovulate, you don't get period pain.

However, most young women will start to ovulate by age 15 or 16. And when they begin to ovulate, they will usually start to experience some menstrual pain.

So what you describe is pretty normal. However, if the pain is too much for you, consult a doc.

QI have heard a lot about premature ejaculation (PE). Exactly how long is a guy supposed to last before climax during sex?

A Well, there is no definite rule about this. But if a guy regularly orgasms so quickly that it is frustrating for him and his partner, it is generally safe to say that he has PE.

Research in various countries shows that men vary greatly in how long they can last. There are parts of the world where women expect their partners to continue for half an hour without discharging. In other places, females are reasonably content with having intercourse for five minutes.

However, one basic principle is this. The longer you can last, the more likely you are to satisfy your partner.

QI thought my wife was a virgin, but she did not bleed on our wedding night.

Does this mean that she had been with another guy before me?

A No. An appreciable number of virgins do not bleed when they first have sex.

So there is no need to fret.

QHello, I'm female and I'm very concerned. I am 20, and a virgin.

But I have little tender bumps outside my vagina and in my groin. They seem to be at the base of each hair.

Is this VD?

A No. If you are a virgin, you cannot have VD. From your description, I am almost certain that you have a slight infection of the hair follicles. The follicles are the little 'pits' out of which hair grows.

Check if this diagnosis is correct. If so, she will probably give you some antiseptic stuff to shampoo the pubic hair with. Don't fret: I am sure that all this will soon clear up.

Q I am a teenage guy, and it is possible that I have a problem. One night recently, while petting with my girlfriend, I felt the urge to ejaculate.

Although I moved well away, some of the semen touched her outer vaginal lip. Is it possible for her to get pregnant that way?

A Pregnancies do occasionally occur in this fashion, even though the girl may be a virgin. The odds are that everything will be OK, though you will just have to wait and see if her menses arrive. Take great care in future.